too much pain

I haven't blogged because of the amount of pain I am in. Last Monday I swear I walked into PT and told him I was about 40% better.  He had me ride the exercise bike for 5 minutes and I think that is what killed me.  Also that evening Hope jumped on my back from behind, needles in my shoulder, startling me and I totally twisted my back. Every day from Monday on I hurt more.  L O T S more.  By Friday I was a 10 and in too much pain to focus at work.  I had PT a 7 am and he said I should not be in so much pain from what they were doing to me.  Both he and another PT were adament that riding the bike would not increase my pain. I KNOW MY BODY though and I know that something like riding it for that long CAN cause a flare up. My follow up appt w/the RA was on the 25th.  He said to try to get in sooner.  I called the Dr at noon and they had 3 pm cancellation.  This is the Dr that takes almost an hour to get to because of traffic.  OY. 

So I get there and he said he had the results from my special neck MRI that I had in mid-Dec. I had almost forgot about that.  Apparantly I have like herniated discs at C4, C5, & C-6.  C-6 is so bad that I need surgery.  Surgery that there is no way I can have.  I have no sick or vacation time.  I have no money.  When I move certain ways I am crushing my spinal cord.  I need to go see a neurosurgeon.  But he was INSISTENT that I see a particular one.  He repeated it over and over. He is in the same office as the one that I saw for my aneurysm but he INSISTED that I see this other guy.  I left there with a weird vibe.  Am I being paranoid?  Could they be in cahoots?  Could I possible not really need surgery but they would work together to give referrals and do unnecesary surgery?  He had also INSISTED that I go to the MRI place in Renton, that no other place could do the MRI that he needed.  But the one from Kirkland had called me to schedule it.  All of a sudden, the DR that I was putting all my hope into, I have a funny feeling about and don't trust.

He did give me some meds to try to ease this flare up.  So far, nothing.  Gasoline in my hip and butt and upper thigh.  That is pretty much what if feels like. It hurts more to sit... or no - does it hurt more to walk? Sometimes my leg/hip doesn't feel like its going to hold me.  I spent the weekend in bed alternating heat & ice. Hoping that rest, along with the new meds would help. Not yet.

Kallyn is doing better.  She has a voice, though it is not her own.  She has quite the British accent going on.  She hates it but I think it is quite cute.  She is afraid it will stay forever, but she has not quit coughing up stuff since she had surgery and it sounds & feels to her like there is "gunk" on her voice box. She still has some pain but she is eating more and she can definately talk. She sees the Dr on Wednesday.